Sir Dave of the Cam and Squire Nick of the Clegg just held a press conference in the rose gardens of Downing Street, amongst the tweeting birds of London town, bathed in the ebbing sunshine. All that was missing was the gents in question holding hands.
Cam spoke about their three joint aims - fairness, freedom and responsibility, and the way to do it is proper leadership.
He explained there will be five Lib Dem secretaries of state in the cabinet, as well as Deputy Dog Nick. He assured us that the Lib Dems will be represented at every level of government.
He says "We are not just announcing a new government with new ministers - we are announcing a new politics."
Deputy Dog far outshines his master when he speaks though. He spoke of their promise to the nation "This is a government that will last... not because it will be easy - there will be bumps and scrapes along the way... this is a government that will last because we are united by a common purpose."
They answer several questions from the press (apparently Sky haven't sacked Boulton yet) including where Clegg will live (not in no 11 as the reporter queried - not sure what Osborne would have had to say about that, anyway) and whether this coalition would be able to last 5 years in reality. Clegg says it has to. That they both had a choice to form coalition or not, and they chose to.
And last but not least Dave of the Cam was asked if he regretted his response to the question 'what's your favourite joke?' and answering 'Nick Clegg' some months ago. While Clegg assured the press Dave said no such thing, Dave admits he did and Deputy Dog jokily walked off in a huff with Dave shouting 'come back!' Much laughter. Bit of a red faced Dave of the Cam too. Humble pie for supper...
It's a brave new world indeed, where left and right talk sensibly and in a grown up fashion for the greater good. We've come a long way, baby. But have we come far enough for this to work?
Looks like everyone was either a) reading my blog yesterday, or b) thought the exact same as me, as OfCom receives 1,500 complaints about Boulton and Burley's conduct on Sky News - the tiresome twosome of hysterics and uncontrollable temper. Now stand on that step and think about what you've done.
Amongst the confusion of last night (Dav seemed to take top spot before many Lib Dems even knew what the deal was), we at least cleared a couple of things up - Gord handed in his resignation (how adorable are his kids? He should have got them to run his party campaign!), then stepped down from party Leader (nice to see a woman in a top spot for a change, Harriett), then Dave hot on his tale moved straight in with a blooming wife. Then the con-lib deal was firmed up.
It looks like this: Dave is PM Nick is his new BFF as Deputy PM (will enjoy watching how this 'works') Lib Dems take 6 seats (a quarter) of cabinet seats, and 15 ministerial jobs in Whitehall. Osborne (god help us) is Chancellor, with Cable his No 2 specifically in charge of the banks. So the Chancellor then? William Hague is Foreign Secretary.
Here's how the papers look this morning: The Sun thinks it's a Dave new world - I see what you did there, Mr Murdoch...:
The Mail gets all romantic on us:
The Telegraph - shouts to us with a HUGE headline (biggest ever?) while tempting us with a watch we're likely never to be able to afford when Dave takes a look at the taxes:
The Times is just about as romantic as the Mail but I like the pic, even if I don't like who's in the pic - perhaps Dave will use it as the Cameron's Christmas card this year?:
And the Guardian, who famously backed the Lib Dems and might end up with more than a little Clegg, I mean egg on their face:
Much more honest than all of these however, is the Mirror. Good luck indeed. To all of us...
Here's Dave of the Cam. He's accepted the Queen's offer to form a new gvmt. He pays tribute to the outgoing PM - that's nice of him. He starts with our problems. Come along Cam - cheer up. He hopes to form a 'proper and full coalition' between the Blues and Yellows. "Nick Clegg and I are both political leaders... we want to work hard for the good of the country and for the national interest... I love this country.. its best days are still ahead.. I believe in public service." (Lots of noise coming from D St - lots of protesters/loud people at the end of the road?) They want to rebuild trust. Build a more responsible Britain. 'Those that can should, and those that can't are always helped... It will be a gvmt that is built on clear values... freedom... responsibility... This is going to be hard and difficult work." Hard work for whom, Dave - you or us?
8:35pm update: Dave of the Cam saluted leaving the Palace for Downing Street, after Queeny asks him to form government. Ladies and Gentlemen, Dave of the Cam, hugger of the hoody is our new PM. Oddly the Lib Dems appear to have no clue as to what's been agreed for the coalition. Lots of talk on the Beeb about whether Dave of the Cam kissed or shook the Queen's hand. Right Honourable David Cameron? Honourable? Beeb cleared up the 'kissing of the hands' dilema - apparently no actual kissing takes place. I can't believe we're actually talking about this.
8:20pm update: Brown talks back at HQ. He looks relaxed and confident. "We achieved more together than any of us could have ever done on our own." He thanks everyone - and confirms Harriet Harmon takes over as Leader of Labour as of now until a new Leader is elected.
"I am Labour and Labour I will always be." "We have denied our opposition the majority which they have taken for granted." "We fought for the future... We fight for progress... We know that progressive change is possible." "Forever we can be proud" "This Labour party is the greatest force for fairness this country has ever seen." Then he assures the Labour party he will still be with them tomorrow, he gives Sarah some lip work and does a little hop and a skip through cheering Labourites..
Hurrah - uplifting - if only they actually had power...
8:10am update: Sir Dave of the Cam and his wife Samantha arrive at the Queens pad. They go inside for tea and cake. Probably. More twitterings: @EmilyBell "Cameron's stuck in traffic, next to the no. 91 bus to Crouch End - know what that feels like" @BellaMack "God I hope they follow [Cameron's] Jag and it ends up pulling over next to stringfellows instead."
Apparently the Lib Dems were due to meet to finalise at 8.30pm - Brown was premature in resigning. In fairness they've had 5 days.
7:50pm update: Gordon leaves Buckingham Palace having tendered his resignation - no police escort which is weird. Cameron will be the youngest PM since early 1800s. Brown is welcomed back to Labour HQ to cheers and clapping.
The Twittered election: @ArmyofDave "Already a Scottish family is homeless and unemployed. That's a Tory government for you." Nick Clegg has been MyDavidCameron'ed.
7:20pm update: Gord is here. He is off to tender his resignation to the Queen - she will invite the 'leader of the opposition to form a government'. He talks about the privilage it's been to serve as PM - not for the fame or ceremony but for the potential to make the country better and fairer. He will 'always admire the courage he sees in the armed forces... they represent all that is good in this country'. 'I have learned a lot about the best of human nature and also about its frailties, including my own.' He thanks his colleagues and staff - he gives an emotional thank you to Sarah and his sons. Sarah stands at his side, hands clasped. He says he is leaving the second most important job he ever had - the first he still cherishes - as a husband and father. He says 'thank you and goodbye'. Was an emotional speech - well received on Twitter. Everyone a bit jittery as to what Dave of the Cam and the 'dark Lords' are going to do to the country. Breath in, everyone.
Sky News still saying that Clegg will step up as Deputy Prime Minister.
7.15pm update: Looks like Gord's going to make a statement outside Downing Street any minute now before heading off to the Palace to step down formally as Prime Minister. BBC reminds us that he was the longest standing Chancellor and has had a difficult PM'ship. We don't know the ins and outs yet of the Lib-Tory deal, or indeed the strains the parties have been under in order to compromise.
4:30pm update: And the rumours begin - this from @GPW_Portland
Lib Dems have six cabinet posts, Clegg becomes deputy PM, sources say.
Dave of the Cam just left Tory HQ. BBC quips 'he's probably just going to McDonalds!' Plus this is pretty sick if it's true:
4pm: BREAKING NEWS
BBC hears 'talks are over' between Labour and the Lib Dems and that 'luggage seen at the rear of No 10'.
(5pm: this from the Graun:
Isn't 24-hour news mad? Earlier I mentioned Laura Kuenssberg's observation that hold-alls were being loaded into a car at the back of Downing Street (4pm). She suggested that it might be a sign the Browns were leaving. A few minutes late the BBC reported that they did not belong to the Browns. Then someone suggested they might belong to the Darlings. Now Jon Sopel has said that they weren't the Darlings' either. It turns out they contained police kit.)
It can only mean one thing. Sir Dave of the Cam's about to be crowned king - watch this space...
NOTE: Ch5 reporter says 'door not quite closed on Labour yet' - but how much do we trust Ch5?
2pm update:
Whereas once the Libs' were the most popular team on campus, it now seems both the Tories and the Labourites are struggling to strike a deal with them.
In true Tory style the far-righters want a Conservative minority gvmt free from Lib Dem involvement (all very well but is that what the British public voted for?). Labour, with renewed confidence since Gord quit, look divided on whether they could actually reach a deal with Clegg.
Seems our Nick is somewhere between and rock and a hard place...
12pm update:
This from Conservative MP John Redwood (a bit hysterically...)
[The current situation is] "a disaster for British democracy... It's all that some of us feared about hung parliaments. There's complete chaos and confusion. I think the Liberal Democrats feel they can dictate everything to either of the two main parties. Of course, they're not able to do that, and they've got to decide which compromises they're going to make."
Meanwhile, Nick's still weighing up his options...
c/o quirkybet.com
11:40am: Alarming update - with it looking more and more likely that the Libs' are eyeing up Labour, bloggers and news agencies are now calling it the Lib-Lab alliance. It's not the alliance as such I have a problem with - in fact I'd far prefer it. But the name! Lib-Lab. Even the Urban Dictionary has been taken unawares.
11:30am update: The tooing and froing so far. First up was Clegg:
My parliamentary party was up into the small hours yet again discussing things. We will act, as ever, responsibly. We will act to try to do our bit to create a stable, good government that the British people deserve. And I really hope that we will be able to make an announcement so we clear up everything and explain to people exactly what our thinking is as quickly as we possibly can.
Then it was Sir Dave of the Cam and he says it's now 'decision time' for the Libs' (note the impatient tone...)
I've made a very full, very open, very reasonable offer to the Liberal Democrats to deliver that stable government. My own members of parliament have shown that they are prepared to put aside party interest in the national interest by agreeing a referendum on the alternative vote.
It's now, I believe, decision time - decision time for the Liberal Democrats - and I hope they make the right decision to give this country the strong, stable government that it badly needs and it badly needs quickly.
Remember Dave of the Cam last Friday went on and on about speed. Well, speed's not what we've got - at this rate we'll be lucky to have a parliament in time for Queeny's speech. Come on Nick, get a coin and call heads or tails. Both you lose.
OK - scrap the Election Blog - this is now called Sky Watch.
This from Super-Bitch Kay Burley
I've got to say I was pretty astounded when this intellectually-challenged reporter goaded poor old Peter Andre into answering questions about how he'd feel if beat-up-faced Alex wanted to adopt his kids (?!?!). But this takes the biscuit.
We're allowed the right to peaceful protest in this country, Ms Burley - it's called freedom of speech.
Sky - please take a long, hard look at yourself.
THIS MORNING:
As with last Friday, the cold light of morning brings nothing much clearer. Labour has wooed the Libs' with Gordon's resignation. The Conservatives have wooed the Libs' with the promise (perhaps) of a referendum on electoral reform.
The Graun's front page this morning describes yesterday as 'events moving at breakneck speed'. I've got to say, Mr Wintour, I respectfully disagree. Although yesterday certainly heated up, we still have no decision.
There's a palpable sense of tension on the news channels and reporters and MPs appear to have resorted to yelling at each other to keep us entertained (this is very cringey - only watch if you like to see grown men point and shout at each other live on television...):
This also goes someway to highlighting brilliantly Sky's biased - their own reporter can't keep a handle on his temper as he shouts 'I'm fed up with you telling me what I think!' and when asked to calm down (and I LOVE this bit) 'he started it!'
And breath...
This from guardin.co.uk, is the situ so far ...
Tory offer to Lib Dems • Referendum on alternative vote for elections to Commons • Cabinet seats and other ministerial jobs for Lib Dems • Agreement on schools, environment and possibly taxation Labour offer to Lib Dems
Labour offer to Lib Dems: • Guaranteed alternative vote for elections to Commons • Possible future referendum on "full PR" of single transferable vote • Full coalition with cabinet seats •Broad agreement on deficit reduction • New leadership for Labour once binding deal with Lib Dems agreed"
We wait with baited breath and secretly cross our fingers that the next PM will be, in fact, Mr David Hotpants Miliband.
7.30pm update: Hague now speaks to the press. Are the Conservatives concerned GB's call to resign is swaying the Lib Dems towards Red? And more importantly are they saying these things to each other - why is this being played out in the press?Here's what Will of the Hague's got to say for himself (we'll not bother to ask where on earth Sir Dave of the Cam is - perhaps he is already too important to talk to 'the people'):
The Liberal Democrats have said to the Conservative party that they are only prepared to enter into a coalition agreement with a party that will change our electoral system to the alternative vote method of voting.
Now, David Cameron and the shadow cabinet and the Conservative MPs have decided that, although our concentration in all of these negotiations has been on the financial situation, on reducing the deficit, on the improvement of education, on the other great issues facing our country, that in the interests of trying to create a stable, secure government, we will go the extra mile. We will offer to the Liberal Democrats in a coalition government the holding of a referendum on the alternative vote system, so that the people of this country can decide what the best electoral system is for the future.
Or they can choose to continue their talks with us, to make a coalition with the Conservative party, which is on offer, in a government that would have a stable and secure parliamentary majority; a majority of 76 in the House of Commons, something highly desirable in our current economic situation; that would have an elected prime minister in David Cameron, the leader who obtained by far the most votes and seats in the general election held last week; and which would say that any reform of our voting system must be subject to a referendum of the people of this country.
We are absolutely convinced that we should not have another unelected prime minister and we should not change our voting system without a referendum. And whatever happens now, and whatever decision the Liberal Democrats make, that is ground on which we will stand.
6:300pm update:
Clegg on Sky news
Gordon Brown has made an important announcement today. It must have been a very difficult thing for him to say personally but I think he has taken it in the national interest and I think his announcement could be be an important element in the smooth transition towards a stable government that people deserve, without of course prejudice and without predicting what the outcome of the talks will be between ourselves and the Labour party.
and the Lib Dem ststement:
Over the past four days we have been working flat-out to deliver an agreement that can provide stable government that can last. The talks with the Conservatives have been very constructive and I am grateful to David Cameron and his team for the effort they have put in. But so far we have been unable to agree a comprehensive partnership agreement for a full parliament.
We need a government that lasts, which is why we believe, in the light of the state of talks with the Conservative party, the only responsible thing to do is to open discussions with the Labour party to secure a stable partnership agreement. We will of course continue our discussions with the Conservative party to see if we can find a way to a full agreement.
Gordon Brown has taken a difficult personal decision in the national interest. And I think without prejudice to the talks that will now happen between Labour and the Liberal Democrats, Gordon Brown's decision is an important element which could help ensure a smooth transition to the stable government that everyone deserves.
5:00pm UPDATE:
Brown speaks outside No 10. Says he has no desire to stay longer than is needed. That he will fasilitate coalition talks with the Lib Dems but will then step down as head of the Labour Party.
He says:
If it becomes clear that the national interest, which is stable and principled government, can be best served by forming a coalition between the Labour party and the Liberal Democrats, then I believe I should discharge that duty to form that government which would in my view command a majority in the House of Commons in the Queen's speech and any other confidence votes.
But I have no desire to stay in my position longer than is needed to ensure the path to economic growth is ensured and the process of political reform we have agreed moves forward quickly. The reason that we have a hung parliament is that no single party and no single leader was able to win the full support of the country. As leader of my party, I must accept that that is a judgment on me. I therefore intend to ask the Labour party to set in train the processes needed for its own leadership election. I would hope that it would be completed in time for the new leader to be in post by the time of the Labour party conference. I will play no part in that contest and I will back no individual candidate.
4:40pm update:
This from the Guardian - made me laugh out loud
My colleague Hélène Mulholland spoke to Simon Hughes at the end of the Lib Dem meeting. Hughes played down the prospect of a deal today: "I am sure there will be a government by the end of this week."
By the end of the WEEK?
4:20pm update: This from David Laws, on behalf of the Lib Dems:
The parliamentary party has agreed that the central priority must be to form a strong and stable government in the national interest. The parliamentary party agreed that the proposals that have been discussed with the Conservative party and that were aired today reflect very good progress on a number of points. But they have also asked for clarification of details in relation to education funding, in relation to fair taxes, and in relation to issues in regard to voting reform and progress on that issue.
The parliamentary party has agreed that the leader will continue to listen to the representations that are coming from the leader of the Labour party, that clarification will be sought from the Conservative party on the particular points that I've just mentioned and they have also agreed that it is vital that progress should be made on all of these matters as soon as possible in the national interest.
The parliamentary party has also agreed that deficit reduction and a plan to bring down the deficit as soon as possible must be at the heart of any agreement.
THIS MORNING: I found this graphic of the house of commons on guardian.co.uk most interesting.
Here's what we'll look like under a Cleggeron coalition:
And here's what it'll look like if Clegg and Brown decide they're going to go to bed together:
Meanwhile it's been 3 days since we voted and even though Clegg's begging us to 'bear with them', no clear decision's been made. He said they're:
"working flat out around the clock to try and act on the decision of the British people last Thursday in the election result"
Is it me or is Clegg also telling us this state of uncertainty is all our, the voter's, fault?
The press are betting we'll have a new PM by the end of the day though and I'm prepared to bet my supper that it'll be Sit Dave of the Cam (all hail).
It's hard to tell which is bigger news, though - the fact we don't yet have a parliament, or the fact the EU's about to go bankrupt. Testing times.
Wow - 4 hours sleep and I literally feel like a new woman. And I wake to results that looks pretty much identical to the exit polls of 10pm yesterday. Tory 306, Labour 258 and Lib Dems 57. Cleggs mulling over Cam's proposal. I'm about to listen again online to BBC Radio 4's News Quiz after rumours that yours truly (well, thisisscornwall.co.uk) got a mention earlier. It's all a bit of a haze. How's everyone else feeling this evening?
3:25pm: Ok, Cornwall is 3 pieces each now. And on that note (32 hours awake), my duvet is calling me. Oh yes. And perhaps a shower. Yes. That would be nice. Thanks to all nearly-thousand of you for reading. xjo
3:00pm: Ok here we go. They're gathered. Hold onto your panty-hos, Cornwall... St Ives determined to give me a last-minute heart-attack. Still waiting... Oh my GOD. I'm starting to actually hate an entire constituency. STILL waiting... Thank GOD for that - Andrew George, Lib Dem, hangs onto St Ives. Crumbs, that was painful.
2:55pm: And after Dave asked Nick to dance, we turn back to St Ives where they're still trying to decide who won...
2:35pm: Dave of the Cam is here. Hushed press. Dave says they've received the biggest increase in seats for 80 years. Cam is patting himself on the back. He thanks everyone - we should be proud (really?) "We have to accept we fell short of an overall majority". Oh God - the angel of doom, wars, economic meltdown - let me guess the answer is you, Dave? Our country's problems are "too big" for "political bickering" and they need to sort things out asap. Cam thanks Clegg for allowing him to seek gvnt creation. Cam wants to make a "big, open and comprehensive offer to the Lib Dems" to work together, and negotiate areas they don't agree in (like the trident - Dave really wants that bad-boy). He recognises Lib Dem strength in education proposals. Both Lib Dem and Tory would seek to 'cut the jobs tax' and get rid of Labour's ID scheme. Both want to reform the electoral system - that all votes have equal value. "A strong basis for a strong gvnt". Will "involve compromise". Dealing with the deficit is 'essential'. "The world is looking to Britain for decisive action". "We could be doing so much better". Cam reckons they "put the national interests first". Dave is bigging Clegg right up. They're new BFFs. It's like Blind Date. Dave's like Cilla. Nick, The Choice Is Yours.
2:30pm Looks like Sir Dave of the Cam is going to wake up before St Ives. Press standing by for his arrival. Everyone MUST stop saying this is unprecedented. It happened in the 70's. That's not unprecedented. Dave of the Cam appears to be back in the pub (see very much earlier blog). Is he some kind of big-drinker?
2:20pm: Our relationship with St Ives constituency right now:
2:10pm: Typical - St Ives and The Isles of Scilly now one of only eleven constituencies who haven't confirmed their count yet.
1:45pm: Here he is. Mr Prime Minister himself. Lives to fight another couple of hours. "We find ourselves in a position unknown". He has a duty to "resolve the situation, not as a member of the Labour party... but as Prime Minister".
Hung Parliament now 'very real'. Need to establish a parliamentary majority which reflects what the public wants. Now we're talking about economics and Greece etc. Eh? Ok back to formation of gvnt: GB says he respects Clegg's decision to 1st talk to Dave of the Cam. They should "take as much time as they feel necessary". GB doesn't rule out 'seeing' any party. Economical stability and electorial reform are decisions they can all make together. People "do not like uncertainity" but he basically says 'that's what you bloody voted for - deal with it'. More eloquently than that, mind.
This, in a nutshell, from Brown then:
1:40pm: Brown about to speak - you can watch live here. Damn the Beeb and their aversion to embed codes...
1:35pm: Still waiting for Gord to appear. UPDATE: Labour 253, Tories 298, Lib Dems 54. Poor Nick. Will GB resign today? (defo not now). Bookies say yes but Sky point out the bookies 'aren't that good at politics'. Brilliant.
1:20pm: St Ives and the Scilly Isles hanging by a shoe string (is that a saying? Exhaustion kicking in...) They won't call now until 2pm but may well have to recount if it's as close as suspected. Blooming eck. We could be here 'till next Monday at this rate. Clegg's had a power-nap. The wuss.
1:05pm: Norwhich North BNP 747 Tory 17,280 - elected - I remember this girl, Chloe Smith, when she got in first at the last general election. I feel old. Lib Dems 7,783 UKIP: 1,878
Ok St Ives/Scilly Isles. Your turn. Come ON. GB expected to make statement in the next half hour (but not to resign - the stubborn git). BBC reporting that Nick Robinson says David Cameron will make a conference call to his shadow cabinet at 1345 this afternoon.
1pm: Tories have held Saffron Walden and Hampshire North East and taken Warwick and Leamington from Labour. Labour 252, Conservatives 294, Lib Dems 52. A Blue minority government? I think all the Leaders are at home brushing up on the Rule Book trying to work out who can muscle out who.
12:40pm: Sky news - students are talking about their outrage at not being allowed to vote after 10pm. Chess club guy just revealed he would have voted Lib Dem if he'd been able to. This is me (if only I had a branch that comfortable):
In other news my mum (the psychologist) says a truly hung parliament would be marv - the cream of the brains of each party making joint decisions like in Germany. We're in Britain though - I just don't think we're that bright.
12:30pm: Conservatives take Warwick and Leamington from Labour. Massive 84% turnout. 93rd gain of the election for the blues. This from the Beeb:
The swing to the Conservatives is not as great as Margaret Thatcher achieved in 1979, according to the results in so far, YouGov pollster Peter Kellner says. David Cameron has won a 5.2% swing, while Mrs Thatcher's was 5.3%, he adds.
12:25pm: Ah yes, the news we've all been waiting for. The BBc got the scoop in the end...
Cheeky Girls singer Gabriela Irimia expresses her sadness for former fiance Lembit Opik, who has lost his Montgomeryshire seat to the Conservatives. She says of the Lib Dem: "The voters have lost a dedicated man who cared for his constituency and the people in it. It was his life."
I wonder if she was on BBC's now infamous The Boat (see earlier blogs) 12:15pm: Dave of the Cam's telling people he's been awake 48 hours. I challenge this. I challenge him to a 'keep-awake' contest. I'm just waffling on a blog - he's making actual decisions/trying to convince decision-man Nick. Who wins?
12:05pm: Just want to remind everyone of the exit poll published 6th May 10pm. It looked like this: Conservatives 307 Labour 255 Lib Dems 59
And we're currently at Conservative 292, Labour 251 and Lib Dems 52. So really I could have gone to bed at about 10.02pm last night then? As it is I'm on 28 hours and counting...
11.55am: Professional Toff Boris Johnson thinks the Tory increase is "bleddy tewwific" - no, sorry, a "marvelous achievement". Still 29 constituencies to call. Including St Ives and the Isles of Scilly which we're following here. Rumour has it that our deciding-man Nick hasn't given Dave of the Cam a call yet. Playing hard to get - I like it. This is how I feel right now:
11:50am: Farage still 'comfortable' in hospital. Galloway for Respect loses his seat. Dave of the Cam will talk to press at 2.30pm. I'm starting to think it's unlikely I will ever sleep again.
11:40am: Well, either Nick's in a great position this morning, or in a very very awful and difficult position. Former Liberal leader Lord Steel says he's in a "hellish position". Downing St says they won't talk to Clegg until all the votes are in. So the end of May then? No, that can't be right because Queeny opens parliament on 25th May. This is all very confusing.
11:20am: Ok - share of vote so far: Labour 29% Conservative 36%, Lib Dem 23% - which is clearly not reflected in seats Labour 251, Conservative 291, Lib Deb 52. Turnout so far has been 65%
11:15am Beeb says:
George Parker, political editor of the Financial Times, tells BBC World Service: "I think the Tories will talk to Nick Clegg. I don't think they'll be prepared to offer a deal on electoral reform because, for the Conservative Party, they see that as a way of excluding themselves from power for a generation."
11:10am: From the Graun
The Guardian's editorial conference has just ended. All our big commentators were there, and as you can imagine, a wide range of views was aired. Martin Kettle said it was all over for Labour, and David Cameron should be allowed to "get on with it".
Polly Toynbee disagreed and said the electorate had not handed a clear mandate to the Tories. She said it was possible that if Gordon Brown resigned as Labour leader, a reformist candidate such as Alan Johnson could take over, promise a time-limited government to deliver electoral reform, and go to the polls again in nine months or a year.
Simon Jenkins said the Guardian had "got what it wanted" and could not complain about "confusion": this is what hung parliaments look like, he said.
Our economics editor Larry Elliott, who has been highly critical of the Liberal Democrats, joked the Guardian should continue to back the party as it would "probably finish them off". He said Nick Clegg had been "exposed" in the final leaders' debate.
11:05am: Paddy Ashdown speaking - Clegg is honouring the wishes of the British public by talking to Dave of the Cam first. Ashdown says Clegg promised he would give whomever had a majority the right the seek government. He is "a man of honour". Ashdown insists Clegg will ask "can Mr Cameron govern in the national interest?" Paddy Ashdown wouldn't be pressed - didn't seem comfortable 'answering questions on behalf of 'them''.
10:45am: Clegg will "be guided by his principals" and "argue for greater fairness in British society.. as well as political reforms to fix the broken political system".
He is talking about both the fact many were left unable to vote in problems with the polling stations, and that overall share of vote is not reflected by a proportionate number of seats in Westminster, and finally we know will be looking for reform in the House of Lords - which we know will make Dave of the Cam uncomfortable.
He returns with fewer seats than he started with, but basically chooses who will become PM. He's talking to the Conservatives first because they have the majority. It's up to them to prove themselves to him.
10:00am: We've got a hung parliament - it's official.
7:50am: OK. It looks hung. UPDATE: Tory 285, Labour 235, Lib Dem 50, with 50 to be called. We're not going to know later today what this hung parliament means for us. Seems a good time to log off from this blog for the meantime. Check your local thisis.co.uk site for local results and reaction. I'll see the South West readers over on thisiscornwall for the morning news. It's been emotional. I wish is was a bit clearer. Brown did better than expected, Clegg worse, and Dave of the Cam might still yet mount the throne. Watch this space.
xjo
7:30am: Ok, that's it for Cornwall until the last count of St Ives and Scilly Isles at midday. Truro and Falmouth just declared conservative. They now have 3 of the 6 Cornish constituencies. Paxo needs to cheer up pronto - we're all tired - it's no excuse.
7:20am: This from the Beeb:
Gordon Brown will only resign if he cannot get a majority in the House of Commons. Only in the event that he fails to reach a deal with the other parties can David Cameron have a go at forming a government. But my instinct is that Mr Cameron will be the next PM, BBC political editor Nick Robinson says.
BREAKING: Sky are claiming that Labour are discussing admitting defeat.
7:10am: BBC now predicts: Conservatives: 306 Labour: 262 Liberal Democrats: 55 Others: 27 with only 67 results yet to come in. We're currently at Tory: 282, Labour: 227, Lib Dem: 49
BBC "the light of morning has made very little clear"
7am: BBC says:
Constitutional expert Philip Cowley says "even if Brown can persuade the Lib Dems to work with him, that won't be enough" to form govt
6:55am: Sorry to focus on Cornwall for a moment but it's on a knife-edge. Camborne Redruth and Hayle are now going through bundle checks after officials refused a re-count of the rumoured count: George Eustice, Conservative, 15969 and Julia Goldsworthy (current), Lib Dem, 15903. Very, very exciting down here.
CONFIRMED: Oh my Goodness - Charles got it - by a majority of just 66 votes. Unber-bloody-lieveable.
6:45am: Ok, whisper is that Conservative has taken Camborne, Redruth and Hayle from Lib Dem Julia Goldsworthy (remember the £1,000 pink rocking chair?). Unconfirmed.
6:40am: Clegg's speech. He repeats the "bitter dismay of many of my constituents who weren't able to exercise their democratic right to be able to vote... that should never ever be able to happen again". He thanks his constituency and apologises for not being around locally as much as he'd like, same as Dave of the Cam. Nationally "this has been a disappointing night for the Liberal Democrats", but adds that he is proud of their campaign. "No one appears to have won emphatically". No one should make "claims or decision that don't stand the test of time". He will be guided by fairness, responsibility and "real change to the way we do politics".
Exit poll which no one believed was right. Lib Dems have done terribly, if not worse than expected. Clegg, however, might decide who becomes our next PM.
6:30am: North Cornwall just retained Lib Dem. 2 of 6 now Lib Dem
6:25am: Here's what the UK looks like this morning:
6:20am: Caroline Lucas, the first elected Green MP for Brighton Pavilion says: "it is the start of a new political force in Westminster". They will "judge who we support on a case-by-case basis". Clever. Pick the winner...
AND... woohoo! My constituency, St Austell and Newquay finally goes to Stephen Gilbert retaining the seat for Lib Dems.
6:15am: Only 3 of the 6 Sheffield seats have been called - and not Nick Clegg's. He's sitting in a room somewhere - doing what? Playing cards? Drinking heavily? Who knows.
BBC says
John Simpson outside Downing Street says the PM wants a "strong, stable and principled" government
Dagenham and Rainham count: BNP: 4952 Lib Dems 3,806 Labour: 17,813 - elected and held Tory: 15,183 Inde 308 UKIP: 1,569 Green: 296 Christian 305
6:10am UPDATE: Tory 267 Labour 209
6am: Rumour has it that both North Cornwall and St Austell and Newquay are going to stay yellow. More as soon as it happens. Barking and Dagenham just coming though - Labour retains, nay increases her majority. Stick that in your pipe, BNP...
5:55am: OK, one last update before the Dawn Blog: Tory 263, Labour 201, Lib Dems 40. And incredibly, I'm still awake...
5:50am: Brighton Pavillion Green 16,238 - elected! First seat at Westminster won by the Greens. Lib Dems: 7,159 Labour: 14,986 Tory: 12,275
5:45am: Tories: "Gordon Brown has had a thumbs down. He does not have a madate.... The country has voted for change." Twickenham - Lib Dem's Cable remains MP. London votes are late apparently because of local election at the same time. My pad of 'interesting stuff' tells me there are 164 local elections going on today. Mind you, Cornwall has no local elections and has only called one of six constituencies. Bah-humbug.
5:40am: Rumours that my constituency, St Austell and Newquay has remained Lib Dem. Have promised a cartwheel if that's the case.. Dorset South just been taken by Conservative from Labour.
5:35am: Lots of blue for Devon: Devon Central and Devon South West both hold Tory Plymouth Sutton and Devenport saw Tory gain from Labour with 6.9% swing, but Plymouth Moor View manage to hang onto Labour, despite a 7.8% swing Labour to Conservative. All to play for in the South West still. And indeed in London.
Reading West: Lib Dem: 9,546 UKIP: 1,508 Labour 14,519 Tory: 20,523 - elected and taken from Labour Green: 582
5:30am: Labour holds Hammersmith. Doing better in London than perhaps expected. Kensington and Cities of London and Westminster both hold Conservative. UPDATE: Tory 241, Labour 189, Lib Dems 39
5:20am: Bloomin eck. Dawn here in Cornwall. Even the seagulls can't believe it's morning.
5:15am: OK London starting to liven up now. Islington North, Islington South and Finsbury and Westminster North all hold Labour. Sutton and Cheam and Carshalton & Wallington both hold Lib Dem. Romford hold blue, as do Enfield North and Enfield Southgate Swing Labour to Tory 5.3% so far overall. Would need 6.9% for a majority
5:05am:
Salford and Eccles Labour: 16,655 - elected and held Eng Democrats 621 UKIP: 1,084 Lib Dems 10,930 Tory: 8,497 BNP: 2,632 (what?)
Lord Ashcroft: will you start paying taxes? "Ummm, errrrr" Why did you give all your money to the Tories? "For the challenge" (not the peerage..)
4:50am Although two thirds of votes are in, Labour marginals in London haven't been called yet. Morley and Outwood : Ed Balls holds seat for Labour. Norwhich South: Lib Debs take from Charles Clarke Labour. UPDATE: Tory 217, Labour 160, Lib Dems 33
4:45am: Gord arrives in London. He seemed "upbeat and relaxed" on the plane. Concentrated on the idea that "it's his duty as PM to establish a stable and strong government." They're all seeing what happens. He says he's done better than people were expecting a year ago, ad the Tories less well. He still has hope he'll remain PM. Described as "wanting to put a brave face on and not be seen as losers".
Tory gain in Pudsey significant with 7.6% swing red to blue. Labour shares have started to drop.
4.35am: Jack Straw talks: "GB is the PM" (what is it with the Labourites?) yes, yes, come along... Paxo asks about rumours of a challenge to GB. Straw denies it.
Reddich: Christian: 101 UKIP: 1,497 BNP: 1394 Lib Dems 7,750 Tory: 19,138 - elected and won hugely over Labour - swing of 9.2% Labour: 13,317
UPDATE: Tory 194, Labour 149, Lib Dems 29
4:30am Dimbleby says that the Conservatives have beaten Labour, but it's still unclear as to whether they'll get a majority or whether they can/will work with another party to form a parliament. Usually we're given an exit poll and then later a prediction poll. However, it's so complicated all they can tell us it 'it's probably going to be hung'. Fat lotta use.
4:25am: Oxford West & Abingdon: Lib Dem lose to Conservative with a 6.9% swing but only 0.3% win.
Luton South BNP: 1,299 Tory: 12,396 Lib Dem: 9,567 Labour: 14,725 - elected and held (beating Ester) Green 366 UKIP 975
4:20am: Swindon South Tory: 19,687 - elected and gained (and significantly booed) Inde: 160 Lib Dems 8,305 Christian 176 Green 619 Labour 16,143 UKIP 2,029
A lot of gains now for the blues. Tories have 175, Labour 136 and Libs Dems 27 Redcar Lib Dem gain from Labour with a massive 21.8% swing! And yet Labour held Rochdale. It's all bonkers - that's the general consensus. 4:10am: Whispers of not one but two recounts in Cornwall, St Austell and Newqay, and Camborne, Redruth and Hayle. Crumbs. A lot of sarcastic love for BBC's The Boat on twitter. The Boat is chilling on the Thames and appears to be full of 'celebs' of some manner of speaking getting more and more sozzled and less and less coherent. Here's Ian Hislop. He looks sweatier than a teenager coming out of an Old Street club.
4:05am: Wyre Forest Conservative 18,793 - elected and gained from inde BNP: 1,120 Labour: 7,298 Inde: 16,150 UKIP: 1,498
1.4% swing to the Conservatives from the Lib Dems overall so far. See Big Ben being coloured in (before dawn...) by clicking here. 330 declared, 319 to go (tonight). More talk of 'pictures of cars' by Dimbleby who sounds weary.
4am: 4a-bloody-m. Can't believe so many of us on the blogs and Twitter are still going strong. Much debate on Twitter about my declarations of love for both Fiona Bruce and secret crush on David Miliband. Barking turnout apparently high - expecting to call at 5am and BNP probably getting 3rd place. BNP votes have been far higher than expected, I think it's fair to say. Nearly half way now. The far South West still looking very bare, count-wise. Should be hearing from them soon though. Southampton votes been counted twice (not officially). Would take a swing of over 10% fro Blues to take from Reds, but it's looking 'extraordinarily close'. Southampton seats to be the safest for Labour in the South East.
3:55am Ok one more totals update before we start the morning wake-up blog Tory 138, Labour 116, Lib Dem 23. Blues pulling ahead. It's like watching your horse at the Grand National go lame.
Oooh, and c/o BBCCornwall
Predictions of a possible recount from our man in Carn Brea for the Camborne/Redruth seat, Cornwall's only 3 way marginal
3:50am: Rochdalegate. Labour retain majority afterall.
3:47am Clegg turns up at his constituency. Didn't he leave his house hours ago or am I going mad with exhaustion?
3.45am: Darling interviewed and says "one of the strengths of our constitution is that there is always a government". Does that mean they will seriously stay in parliament without a majority? Is he expecting to move back into Downing St? "It will depend what the House of Commons looks like... the pattern is mixed... the swings are not uniform... whatever happens we have to get on with it". He clarifies that GB is the Prime Minister. Right'o.
3:40am Hastings and Rye: Tory gain from Labour with 41.1% and 3.3% swing. Lewes hold with 52% Bexhill & Battle (Mum's constituency) Tory hold with 51% but a 4% swing conservative to Lib Dem.
3:35am: Burnley Lib Dem gain over Labour with huge 9% swing. Cameron leaves Sheffield. More interesting 'person-in-a-car' shots... Totals now: A third of constituencies have been called: Tory 118, Labout 107, Lib Dems 19. What the hell happened to Clegg, anyway?
3:30am: Man-on-the-ground Richard Whitehouse whispers the rumour that South East Cornwall may have swung hugely from Lib Dem to Conservative. Declaration expected soon.
3:25am: Ok - into the 200's now. Tory take the lead for the first time with 102 seats, Labour 99, and Lib Dem 14
Newton Abbott: Tory gain over Lib Dem with 43% and a 5.8% swing. Crumbs.
3:20am: David Miliband - oddly sexy - can he imagine a hung parliament where parties work together? He says yes - if that's the will of the voter. Denies that Labour are 'already in talks with the Lib Dems'.
Truro and Falmouth count is about to start. Julia Goldsworthy [Lib Dem - currently holding] has arrived at the count now, I’m told she is looking glamorous in a dress and stilettoes. Jude [Labour] has also arrived although I haven’t had an update on her outfit...
Tory and Labour still neck-and-neck at Labour 92, Tory 91, Lib Dem 13. Paxo gets gnarly again. Can Tories imagine doing a deal with the Lib Dems? They duck the question in quite an extraordinary manner.
3:05am Totals update: Tory and Labour now drawn 76 each, Lib Dems 9 Gordon leaving Fife to fly from Edinburgh to London for the rest of the votes. Dimbleby notes 'I hope there's no volcanic ash...'
3am: Cam's speech - thanks his constituency - talks about the 'new gvnt' sorting out the mess of the polling stations this evening. Apologises for not spending more time locally in the last month. Thanks his team. Promises to work hard (and play hard, Dave?). 'Conservatives are on target'. Should be 'proud of the campaign we fought' It 'didn't need to make negative remarks about others'. Change requires new leadership... we will stand ready'. What will guide him is the 'national interest'. He says 'ee live in difficult times, but its a great country and we will come through them'.
2:55am: Now for Dave of the Cam's Witney Lib Dems 11,233 Conservative: 33,973 - Cameron re-elected Labour 7,511 Green: 2,385 UKIP: 2,001 Speaker doesn't seem to be able to speak numerically. Some VERY strangely dressed independent standers.
Broxtowe UKIP 1194 Green: 423 Labour 20,196 BNP: 1,422 Conservative 20,585 - elected gained from Labour - 2.6% swing Lib Deb 8,907
2:50am Rumours of recount in Birmingham Edgbaston. Could have a South East Cornwall result at 3.15amish - follow Richard Best's blogs for the Cornish results.
2:40am: Looks like they might be calling Cameron's Witney soon. Over 100 constituencies now called Labour 60 Tory 44 Lib Dems 6 Bond markets opened at 1am
Somerton & Frome remain Lib Dem despite Tory attention (no. 11 on their hit-list) with 47.5% of the vote. Folkestone & Hythe Tory hold despite a Lib Deb to Tory swing of 2.6%. Eastleigh just been confirmed as Lib Dem, taking from Tory, same as Eastbourne, although they've lost Harrogate to the blues. 2:30am OK, the maps are starting to look quite blue now. 5.7% swing Labour to Tory in England - thought it would be an 'English' Tory gvnt. However, Labour to Tory swing in Wales is actually 4.9%. The gap starts to close: Labour 53 Tory 39 Lib Dem 5 (what's going on, Nick?) I'm going to call it - Tory majority. Swings are too widespread and too massive.
2:20am East Devon Tory hold with 48.3% Dorset West Tory hold with 47.6% Kettering Tory hold with 49.1% Norfolk South Tory hold with 49.3% Vale Of Glamorgan Tory gain over Labour with 41.8% and a 6.1% swing Everyone now talking about Montgomeryshire where Tory have gained the seat over Lib Dems with 41.3% and a whopping 13.2% swing. Bridgwater & West Somerset Tory hold with 45.3% but a Tory to Lib Dem swing of 2.9%
2:10am A bit confusing, and not just brought on by excess Jaffa cakes. Tories aren't doing as well as the exit polls suggested earlier this evening. However, the swings are still massive in some areas, but not always giving the blues an advantage. Perhaps simply outlining how much Labour win by last election. Clegg doing nowhere near as well as his Leader Debate popularity would have suggested. As Paxo points out, 3 weeks ago Clegg was 'walking on water' but barely featuring again this evening. Mind you, much of the South West still to be called. In fact, most of the country still to be called.
Totals so far: Labour 43 Tory 23 Lib Dem 4
2am Jaffa cakes are somewhat depleted. Typing hands are a little achy, but we troop on regardless because this is political history in making... Exeter just went Red (hold)with 38.2%. Another massive Labour to Tory swing of 6% though. Terrifying for Labour, although they're retaining their crown in Scotland.
Glasgow East: Socialist: 454 Labour: 19,797 - elected BNP: 677 Tory: 1,453 SNP: 7,957 UKIP: 209 Lib Dems: 1617 So SNP lose a seat in Glasgow. BNP candidate booed hugely.
Ok - that's the first 50. New 'early morning' blog coming up...
1:55am: Totals update: Labour 28 Tory 14 Lib Dem 4
My town of birth Sevenoaks: Tory hold 56.8% with a Lib Dem to Tory swing of 3.1% And up at the other end of the island, Na H-Eileanan An Iar [Western Isles] SNP hold 45.7% Staffordshire Moorlands Tory hold 45.2% with another Labour to Tory swing of 5.7%
1:50am: On to London: Putney called: Tory hold with 52% and a massive 9.9% swing from Labour to Tory. Battersea now confirmed: Labour (35.1%) loses to Tory 47.3% with 6.5% swing. Tooting: Labour hold 43.5% with a swing Labour to Tory of 3.6%
1:45am: Our man-on-the-ground @RWhitehouse13 says "still very early, but word here is that SouthEast Cornwall and St Austell & Newquay have gone to the Tories and North Cornwall to Lib Dems".
Rushcliffe called: Tory hold 51.2% The Wrekin called: Tory hold 47.7% Clwyd called: Labour hold 38.4% Christchurch called: Tory hold 56.4% Clacton called: Tory hold 53% Broxbourne called: Tory hold 58.8% Guildford called: Tory hold 53.3% with a Lib Dem to Tory swing of 6.9% 1:40am: Yeovil has been called Lib Dem. Confirmed numbers to come. Llanelli called Labour hold 42.5% Islwyn called Labour win Fife North East called: Lib Dem hold 44.3%
Overall seats update: Labour: 22 Tory: 9 Lib Dem: 4 1:35am Brown speaks. Mentions everyone's God given right to vote and thanks his constituency for giving people the opportunity to do so. He talks about friendship and support and pride. Been voted in 7 elections in a row. Blows his own trumpet a bit. He thanks Sarah for her love and support and legendary campaigning skills. 27 years as an MP. Boomin' ek.
1:30am: City of Durham: Labour: 20,496 UKIP: 856 Inde: 172 ......
Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath UKIP: 760 Labour: 29,559 - BROWN ELECTED SNP: 6,550 Lib Dems: 4,269 Conservative: 4,258
1:25am: Filton & Bradley Stoke: Conservative hold 40.8%
Ynys Mon: Labour hold 33.4%
Easington: Labour hold 58.9% but a Labour to Lib Dem swing of 7.7%
Sedgefield: Labour hold 45.1% but with a massive Labour to Conservative swing of 11.6% "The Conservative government will be very much an English government" 1:20am: OK round-up so far Labour: 10 Conservative: 4 Lib Deb: 2 But the Tory swings are far greater than the exit polls suggested. BBC presenters are being far too aggressive. It's 1.20 in the morning for Gawd's sake. Stop shouting.
1:10am Putney: BNP: 459 Conservative: 21,223 - elected and held Labour: 11,170 Green 591 Lib Dem 6,907 UKIP 435 9.9% from Labour to Conservatives
Upper Ban called: Democratic Unionist Party hold 33.8% Motherwell & Wishaw called: Labour hold 61.1% Torbay called: BNP: 709 Green: 468% UKIP: 2,628 Labour: 3,231 Lib Dem 23,126 - Elected and held Conservative: 19,048 64.6% turnout - 8%more than last election
Broxbourne called: Conservative hold 58.8%
1am: Kingswood called: Conservative elected with 40.4% - 9.4% swing from Labour to Conservative.
Basildon South rumour of a Tory seat.
Rutherglen & Hamilton West called: Labour hold with 60.8%
12:50am: First South West count to be called : Thornbury & Yate Lib Dem elected 51.9% 75% turnout 4.3% swing Lib Dem to Conservative Darlington called: Labour hold with 39.4%
Durham North called: Labour hold
Arfon called: Plaid Cymru elected with 36% - a loss for Labour
Lagan Valley called: Democratic Unionist Party hold with 49.8% 12:45am: 6 seats confirmed. Beeb hasn't been keeping up. Also called: Tyrone West: Elected Sinn Fein with 48.4% Antrim North: Elected Democratic Unionist Party with 46.4% Belfast East: Elected Alliance Party Naiomi Long with 37.2%. The first time this party have ever won a seat.
12:40am: Jenny Watson Chair of the Electoral Commision explains they have no power of direction over polling stations. They set the law, but can't enforce it. Bonkers. At least she say's it's of 'significant concern'.
Dave of the Cam turns up to a local pub. For some reason. Hackney South voters now saying they were turned away an hour before the polls officially closed.
12:25am: Tories are tweeting that they suspect they've taken a seat at Battersea.
12:15am: Joan Collins thinks Dave of the Cam would make a good PM based soley on his looks. Crumbs. Ok, more on the bomb alert - the Beeb say:
Counting at a centre in Londonderry has been officially suspended following a security alert. About 500 people have been moved out of the Templemore Sports Complex after a hijacked car was abandoned in the car park. The gymnasium where the count was taking place has been closed and the doors sealed. Army bomb disposal experts are on the scene.
GB arrives at his constituency. Ken Clarke grumbles that the BBC 'got terribly excited about pictures of Cameron leaving his house in a silver car earlier'. Paxo says that's the 'joys of television'.
12:10am: Sir Dave of the Cam has left his house to head to the count. Lots of constituencies claiming doors closed at 10 and queuing voters turned away, including Sheffield and Hackney North. Birmingham apparently called everyone into the polling station to shut and lock the doors at 10pm so public could still vote. Bomb alert in Northern Island. Bomb squad on their way.
12:00am: Beeb reporting that Labour are claiming 6,00 voters were turned away in Chester because the polling list hadn't been updated. GB leaves his house to go to the count.
11:50pm Nick Griffin just arrived in Barking. Dimbleby on BBC refer to BNP as 'that ilk' and a 'racist party'. Reports of polling stations which a) turned people away at 10pm b) ran out of ballot papers and c) let people vote after 10pm - after the exit polls were published. Bit of a shambles, really. George Osborne tells Beeb:
I do not think there's any question of Labour being able to continue following this massive rejection of the Labour party. The Conservative party has gained more seats than at any time since 1931.
11:40pm: Sunderland count. David Cameron's 'wild card' - would be the first Conservative seat in Sunderland since 1963. Would need a 12.8% swing to win it:
Lib Dems: 7,191 Labour: 19,495 - elected UKIP: 1,094 Conservative: 12,770 BNP: 1,913 57% turnout. A 4.8% swing from Labour to Conservative. BNP appear to have attracted rather a lot of votes.
11:35pm: The Twittered election: @charlotte0387 "BREAKING STORY: voters turned away at ranmoor polling station are refusing to let the ballot box out of the building. Police there." Exit poll suggested 5.5% swing for Tories - the first two called suggests swing of 9%
11:25pm: Second count: Washington and Sunderland West count: Lib Dems: 6,382 Conservative: 8,157 Labour: 19,615 (53%) - elected UKIP: 1,267 BNP: 1,913 54% turnout - even worse! 11.6% swing to Conservative - the largest swing we've seen since 1945
10:50pm First count through: Houghton and Sunderland South count: BNP: 1,961 Lib Dem: 5,292 UKIP: 1,022 Conservative: 8,147 Labour: 19,137 (50%) - elected Independent: 2,142
Turnout just 55% - terrible! Still a Tory swing by 8%. If that's duplicated elsewhere we've got a Tory gvnt. Weird tweet from @UKLabourParty "Please retweet if you have voted labour. Thank you". Paxo just likened Mr Brown to a 'squatter'. Love Paxo.
Feeling tired already. Other half is waining and Facebook friends are fast dropping off since first result called. Must find some caffeine...
Slight change to the exit polls - 2 down for the Conservatives, 2 more for Labour.
10:40pm Trendsmap showing tweets over the UK currently looks like this: Exit polls showing a Tory swing of 5.5%. Talk of Lib Dems agreeing to work with a Conservative gvnt.
10:20pm Reports coming in that Sheffield constituency polling station closed it's doors on queuing voters at 10 pm. Could mean trouble...
10pm: So that's it. If you didn't vote you're too late now. BBC exit poll shows that we're headed for a hung parliament. Prediction of seats:
Conservatives 307 (need 326 for majority win) Labour 255 Lib Dems 59
9:10pm The Alternative Election Night just played The Final Countdown (see earlier blog)! Are they following me? Perhaps they would later like to play Bobby Brown...? Or replace Laverne with me? Now there's an idea...
9pm Crumbs. It's that time already. The Alternative Election Night has just started on Ch4. Already a truly terrible 'joke' about Big Brother and voting for who you want to 'stay in the house'. Is that canned laughter or is there really a hyena in the studio?
Not sure I can stomach 4 hours of that. If you want to tweet them it's #c4altelection. Exit polls and the like coming up..
OK, I've dug out for you, dear reader, the best most concise version on what happens should we be left with a hung parliament, because there not being once since I have been alive, I was a little sketchy on the details myself. And here it is. Knock yourself out. Good ol' BBC.
The bit I love the most? That it's up to old Gord, nay, it's his duty, to stay in power until they can work out which party or combination of parties can 'command the most support in parliament'.
There's gold at the rainbow's end after all, eh Mr Brown?
8:00pm UPDATE:
2 hours until the polls close - where did the day go? I'm told the rain's holding off in most areas around the UK, which is good news for those without umbrellas (do people really not vote because of the rain?).
Attention turns to TV coverage - BBC and ITV start at 9.55pm (will they play The Final Countdown in the final minutes? I hope so...).
Channel 4's hugely advertised 'alternative election night' starts at 9pm with David Mitchell, Jimmy Carr, Lauren Laverne and Charlie Brooker. Lauren Lavern? Really?
Anyway, BBC2 and Ch5 are ignoring all things political tonight which is probably for the best.
Currently loving this BBC slideshow of all kinds of odd polling situations, including hair salons, pubs and local shops. In a nutshell, that's why I love this country. Good on you, Britain.
6:30pm UPDATE:
OK I've stocked up. Fruit, chocolate, crisps, caffeine. The telly's on (admittedly right now it's Friends on E4 - hey - I've only got a year left!), computer's on, laptop's on...
Has anyone noticed the Facebook 'have you voted' banner on the Newsfeed? Mines showing 1,087,598 Facebook users have voted so far. A little bit of digging takes us to a 'Democracy in the UK' page, which in turn takes us to the YouTube and Facebook digital debate where you can watch virals of the Part Leaders talking about issues like immigration and the digital economy bill (of course...).
Never has an election been so targeted at the under 30s (*smug yet alarmed I fit into this category only by a month). It will be very interesting to see how many of the younger generation turn out to vote.
I've also found this Yahoo Twitter map which follows what each of your constituency candidates are tweeting about. Crafty.
Ladbrokes report that their biggest market move has been on turnout being over 70%. The odds have collapsed to 5/4 (from 15/8 this morning) on turnout topping the 70% mark. A 70% turnout would be very high in the context of recent history, although turnout did used to be routinely above 70% and even topped 80% twice in the 1950s.
4:45pm UPDATE:
As most people's working day comes to a close, trendsmap show this pic of tweets in the uk:
This from the Guardian about Farge:
Farage's campaign manager, Chris Adams, said: "Apparently the plane nosedived. We had a banner attached to the back of the plane which basically got wrapped around the tail. The pilot had sent out a mayday signal, and it basically crash dived. It's all a bit of a shock, especially on polling day.
He said Farage had facial injuries and had also damaged his ribs.
Also in the wars today, Labour candidate John Benton - it's a dog's life. The BBC reports:
The Labour candidate for Bootle on Merseyside has had the tip of his finger bitten off by a dog while out campaigning. Joe Benton, 77, was taken to hospital after the animal bit him as he pushed an election leaflet through a letter box. Mr Benton has been unable to vote for himself as a result and will not be able to attend tonight's count.
We're feeling a bit jealuos abuot the BBC election reporter John Kay who's up in Slod, Gloucestershire where they have a polling station in the local pub. Sounds like a jolly good idea to me. Mine was in a church. Something of a different feeling...
2:45pm UPDATE
c/o Civics Reporter Richard Whitehouse, c/o The Graun, c/o Twitter - we don't know where it originates from, but it's a beauty:
Also doing the rounds today is this clip form last night's newsnight. Dear ol' Paxo, never one to suffer fools gladly...
2pm UPDATE:
Let it never be said that election day didn't go off with a bang. Constituency candidate Nigel Farage crashed in a light aircraft carrying a UKIP banner - that's dedication for you. Farage is still in hospital, but is 'comfortable' (perhaps he's got private healthcare) - no word yet on the hapless pilot. We hope (s)he's ok.
This from a UKIP spokesperson:
"Just after 8am this morning, a light aircraft carrying Nigel Farage, the Ukip MEP and chief spokesman, crashed at Hinton-in-the-Hedges airstrip in Northamptonshire. At this time we understand that the pilot has been taken to hospital in Coventry. Farage has been taken to Horton hospital in Banbury for his injuries.
Ukip is sure that everybody involved in today's general election will join us in hoping and praying that the pilot recovers from his injuries as soon as possible."
The three Kings, sorry Party Leaders have all voted in their constituencies this morning. Also, the great British public have been busying themselves today creating parodies of the Cameron poster I posted below. Click here to see the best.
A bit of election day triva for you - there are currently 646 constituencies across the UK, and a total of 42,000 polling stations dotted about. 60% of us voted at the last eleciton, but even that didn't smash the 70% turnout in 1997 when we welcomed dear Tony into No. 10 with a landslide victory.
Take That is running a close second to Bobby Brown for the E-Day song:
THIS MORNING:
So here we are. E-day. Have you voted yet?
I have. It took me rather a while to find the entrance to my polling station here in Newquay (blame the lack of signs and the Tom-Tom generation).
One vote. In the box. Democratic process - job done.
Now all we have to do is sit back and wait. And watch the telly. And read the papers.
TV cash-machine Simon Cowell announced yesterday in the Sun that Dave of the Cam's his man. Multi-millionaire Simon. Voting for Dave. Sorry if I don't faint with surprise, Mr Murdoch.
Nor does it surprise me that the Sun today is telling me that Dave's our only hope.
Are they trying to tell me that voting for Dave is the same as voting for Obama? Really? If Dave's actually our only hope I might just be crying into my pillow tomorrow morning.
But the Guardian/ICM poll taken during 3rd and 4th May shows that Dave, is in fact, slipping ahead. Tory 36%, Labour 28% and Lib Dems 26%. What happened to the Libs grand catch-up?
Funnily (or not funnily) enough the Graun agreed with me that Nick's been looking like a one trick 'roll my eyes at the other two' pony since he blew us away at the first debate by not being a figment of our imagination.
The rumour is though, that many are undecided. These people do exist. My other half is undecided.
As the rain dribbles down on a quietly excited Britain we have to hope that the weather doesn't keep people indoors and that there's still everything to play for.
